3 Easy Steps to Standup

Trying to do your first standup comedy performance without any instructions can be like learning to drive with mittens: It's not fun and you'll probably crash. Here are three steps that will markedly increase your chances of success.

1. Find your unique topic.

Every TV show is about something. "Party Down" is about people working at a catering company. "Two and a Half Men" is about two brothers living with a child. If we were to turn your life into a five-minute sitcom, what would it be about?

To find a topic for standup, ask yourself the following questions: What's unique about me that's also relatable to other people? What's my relationship status? (Single, married, dating, divorced?) Where do I work? What kind of family do I come from? (Italian, Asian, control freaks?) What is my most passionate hobby? (Reality TV, celebrity gossip, video games, working out, hip-hop music?) What is unique about me physically? (Short, tall, skinny, albino?) What is my personality like? (ADD, OCD, people pleaser?)

You can also start to anticipate which topics will be most compelling to an audience. Do you think people would be more interested in your job at Hooters or your rare toe fungus? (Hint: Hooters beats fungus.) Make a list of topics and find one that you want to talk about and that your audience will also care about.

2. Find the truth.

If you watch standup, you will begin to notice something very interesting. Most comedians' jokes have two parts: a really true and insightful statement (that isn't funny), followed by an illustration of that statement (that is funny).

The really insightful statement is called a "premise" and the funny illustration is called an "act-out." Most new comedians fail because instead of looking for a smart insight that forms the foundation of a good joke, they start by trying to be "funny." That rarely works.

Instead, say something smart and insightful about your topic. For example, if your topic is "being married," you might say something like "What's weird about being married is that the thing that first attracts you to your spouse eventually becomes the thing that most annoys you about them."

Start creating insightful premises about your topic by asking yourself questions about it. In Judy Carter's book "The Comedy Bible," she suggests that you ask the following questions about your topic: What's weird about being married (or being Italian, or working at Best Buy, or whatever your topic is)? What's hard about it? What's scary about it? And what bugs you about it? By asking yourself how you feel about your topic and creating insightful premises, you set the stage for comedy.

3. Ask questions about the premise, and act out the answer.

Katrina Law, an alumna of my standup comedy class and star of "Spartacus: Blood and Sand," was working on a joke about being multiracial. The premise was: "What bugs me about being multiracial is that people think it gives them license to interrogate you about your ethnic background."

Now was the time to ask some questions. Eventually, after asking, "Why do people question others about their ethnic background?," we realized that it was because people like to think they can predict your future actions based on your ethnic mix. We created the following act-out:

Katrina: "What bugs me about being multiracial is that people think it gives them license to interrogate you about your ethnic background. People will come up to me and say things like, 'What are you?' I'll tell them, 'I'm German, Chinese, and Italian.' They'll ask, 'And how does that make you feel?' I'll say, 'Like invading your country on a rice-powered Vespa.'

So that's it. Find your relatable topic, say something insightful about it, and illustrate that insight with an act-out. After you've written a few of these premise/act-outs (also known as "jokes"), you'll find a list of open mics and comedy clubs to perform at on my website, www.standupcomedyclass.com. Now you know how standup is written: Be unique, be truthful, ask questions, and be funny.

In addition to being a successful actor, writer, and comedian, Gerry Katzman has been named favorite comedy teacher in L.A. by Back Stage's readers for two years in a row.