Since we are on the cusp of Halloween, I thought it would be the perfect time to address fear. One simple negative thought can create overwhelming fear. This thought leads to the next, and the next thing you know, you are holding your own self as an emotional hostage.
Unresolved fear acts as a vicious guard dog that prevents us from leaving our comfort zones. We may desperately want change, a new beginning, a different ending, but sometimes just the act of making a different choice is just too great. Fear’s sister "doubt" then takes control.
A wall built from fear detaches you from your creativity and can restrict you from making different personal and professional choices that will prevent you experiencing life’s positive changing events.
It is human nature to long for change. We change molecularly every second from the time we are born. Yet, change is the thing that we all can fear. We find ourselves unsure and hold back on making important decisions. Even when they are to our benefit.
Think of fear as what it is: Simply energy inside you. A very powerful energy. Here are some ways to convert that energy so that it becomes your positive fuel.
1. Even more than change, what is actually the scariest thing is our own inner truth. Ask yourself, “Why am I hesitant?” A negative thought creates doubt that creates fear resulting in hesitancy. Many of these initial thoughts and perceptions are started at the subconscious level. It is imperative we take the time to excavate these negative self-beliefs in order to create change. These beliefs are based from an experience in our past that is NOT TRUE to who we are today. In essence, we are living and recreating our own self-lie. A good way to connect at your subconscious level is to stop thinking and write down what is actually going on inside you. Write statements such as “I am hesitant about this audition because," "I am hesitant about finding new representation because," "I am hesitant about making a change to advance my career because," etc. Let your answer quickly come out on the page without thought. It does not need to make grammatical sense. It will not be read by another. Allow yourself to connect to the false truth you are operating from.
2. Take ownership of what really is stopping you. Empower yourself with the truth that YOU do have ownership of making the internal changes. When you begin to understand the real cause of your fear and identify any inner beliefs that lower your self-worth, be clear that you hold the power to change these beliefs. During the day, whenever a negative self-thought arises say, “STOP” and IMMEDIATELY replace it with a positive thought. At first, you will be surprised how many times you actually need to do this! Choose to become the master over your thoughts with the intention that your thoughts will no longer be the master over you.
3. Your subconscious is simply an order taker. It cannot analyze or judge. What ever it is told, it believes. And then programs the body to look for all outside stimulus to back up what it has been told. If your thought tells it “I am not worthy,” it believes you. And all your actions will back up this thought. In situations that may actually be positive, you will perceive as negative personal assaults. Auditions will become “rejections” instead of what they are opportunity’s to get to do what you love.
4. Get clear with what you want. Most importantly, WHY do you want it? How does it connect to your higher purpose? The thing that is bigger than you? How does it help others? Once you discover the blocks preventing you from making positive changes, you can dissolve them. With this internal shift, you will begin to confidently look forward to taking different actions. Write down what those actions are to be. Write goals to accomplish in a year. Then what actions you are going to take each month towards them?
5. Change your definition of "change." Instead, when you think of change identify it with the “New Positive Experience” you desire to have. Make it FUN! And enjoy the Adventure.
I have worked with many actors, who were on the brink of booking a star-making role, and they begin to panic. The energy of the opportunity felt bigger than anything they had ever experienced. They had struggled for so long that this huge, life-changing success brought on massive fear of the unknown. I explained to them that if they hesitate for one moment, the opportunity will stop as they are putting out the energy they are not ready for it. And their actions will follow suit. Remember when big opportunities come your way, they are there because YOU ARE READY. Calm your mind, breath, and say out loud “Universe, Bring it on!!!” When you feel the energy of love and gratitude, this converts that fear into a powerful, positive place.
Constance Tillotson is CEO of Sterling Studio. Her studio had over 200 bookings last year. Actors in her studio are renowned for their extraordinary work in major feature films and television. Her booking actors range from 5-years-old on up. She is also a top pick for private theatrical coaching and preproduction preparation. She is an actor, writer, director, and producer. She also works globally with children building self-esteem through filmmaking. She is a talent manager at LA Management where she helms the careers of a select group of successful clientele. www.facebook.com/sterlingstudio