Secret Agent Man

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  • Advice

    A Sense of Entitlement

    When graduation day arrived, I had a sense of entitlement that cannot be measured; I was ready to take Hollywood by storm. It took me less than six months to realize I knew nothing.

  • Advice

    L.A. B.S.

    So why does everyone lie here? Is it something in the water? Could the Santa Ana winds be at fault? No. It's a survival mechanism.

  • Advice

    My Rebuttal

    I realized there's a major disconnect between how actors see an agent's behavior and the reality behind our actions.

  • Advice

    Happy Thanksgiving

    Like most actors, Amy had struggled for years to find a good agent, and now that she had one, everything seemed to be going wrong. I explained that she had to keep the faith.

  • Advice

    Let's Get Real About Reality

    Would you like to know my definition of a loser? It's someone who blames others for his or her own shortcomings.

  • Advice

    When the Situation Gets Sticky…

    Remember, James Bond is licensed to kill. When you have representation, you're licensed to say, "Call my agent."

  • Advice

    Hit the Road, Jack

    Sometimes I wonder if actors are born with a genetic mutation that forces them to get in their own way. It's the only possible explanation for all the self-destructive behavior.

  • Advice

    Santa Claus Ain't Coming to Town. You Are!

    This is the time of year when agents start a betting pool to see which actors will remember to give us a little something as a thank-you for all the hard work we do.

  • Advice

    Waiting and Waiting and…

    Waiting is a basic component of this business, and that applies to all of us, including yours truly. But it would be a major mistake if you didn't offset all that waiting with a little forward.

  • Advice

    L.A. Noir

    It's 10:29 a.m. The city is Beverly Hills. I'm your narrator, Secret Agent Man. Those who know me say I'm a good man in a bad town. Those who don't wish they did. These are my stories.