Do you have a soul?
What do I even mean by that question? It helps to give an example. Have you ever seen a young child who seems wise beyond the his/her true age? Perhaps you almost feel as though he/she has already lived another lifetime. We would call that child an “old soul.”
If you have a very privileged life with no worries, chances are you could end up a very shallow, superficial person. You might not have much compassion. That’s why you sometimes see wealthy or famous people who try to enrich their children by having them help at homeless shelters on Thanksgiving. Princess Diana used to take her sons to many poor and underprivileged places to help them grow into deeper and richer adults.
I have a saying that I use frequently: “The depth of your pain measures the depth of your compassion.” I am so grateful for all of the pain and struggle I have faced in my life. Without hardship, I would not have learned my greatest life lessons. I am much kinder, deeper, and stronger because of those lessons.
Would I have chosen to not have learned that beautiful lesson of facing the death of a loved one when I lost my mother. Never. Those were sweet tears of pain that can only be felt from the loss of a lifetime of love. I cherish those tears. I treasure all of the lessons only learned by experiencing deeply. Those are soul lessons.
Would I have chosen to not have struggled through the hard year after my last divorce that left me unexpectedly in debt? That was also the year my beloved dog died of cancer. Guess what? I wouldn’t trade any of it. I would never have started my coaching studio without all of that hardship. I would not have found the courage and strength to evolve without those hard lessons. I treasure those lessons. I am more fulfilled because of all of depth of soul caused by the depth of pain.
Hey, I love to laugh and be silly and all the fun stuff, too. But I would not trade any of the tough days. Those are the ones that really shaped my soul.
Does your character have a soul?
Think of your character as actually having a soul just like you. Try not to get stuck thinking of your character as just lines from a piece of paper that you need to puff up to make look three-dimensional. Your character should come alive. How about sacred simplicity? Just imagine that your character is flesh and blood with an actual soul. Your character is a human being just like you. And just like you, your character is superficial without a depth of soul.
That is why you need a backstory for your character. And that is why you always find the pain in your character’s life. You want to add struggle and hardships to your character to build and enrich his/her soul. Otherwise, like privileged human beings, your character will end up lacking, well…character. Translation: Your character will be boring and unreal.
Try to think of giving your character life lessons. These soul-building choices will make your character deeper, more believable, and much more interesting. Plus, you will have lots of powerful buttons to be pushed to cause spontaneous, organic reactions. Your character will go through the same type of growth as a real human being. Use the pain to dig a hole in your character’s soul that can be filled with compassion. Or perhaps that hole in your character stays empty, or it might fill with anger and harden.
All of these things happen to real human beings. All of our souls are full of our individual life stories. Your character needs a soul. Or why would I care about him/her?
To each of you glorious souls out there, hang in there with your beautiful life lessons. They seem miserable at the time. They seem like they are there to destroy you. But take it from one who has been through it many times: Just say thank you and grow. You will be a better person and actor because of each one of those hardships.
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and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Backstage or its staff.
