Me, Myself, and I: A Guide to Playing Narcissistic Characters

Article Image
Photo Source: “Hacks” Credit: Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/Max

On the sitcom “Frasier,” Dr. Niles Crane (David Hyde Pierce) remarked that he’d written “a gripping case history of a narcissistic opera singer,” adding, “I called it: ‘Me, me, me, me, me!’ ” It’s a fun joke, sure, but it also gets at the heart of what narcissism is. If you find yourself about to take on a narcissistic role, or if you’re wondering if your self-absorbed character just might be a narcissist, read on.

What is a narcissist?

Generally used as a negative descriptor, a narcissist is a person whose self-interest goes beyond what is healthy. That said, a little narcissism can have its benefits; with self-interest comes self-confidence, and as long as it isn’t wildly misplaced, that can lead to success. That means that you can find narcissists all over the place, from blue-collar workers to CEOs.

Characteristics of a narcissist

Narcissists are inherently deeply self-centered and conceited. The most telltale sign of a narcissist is someone putting their own needs before everyone else’s, and does so to a fault. We might all be the center of our own universes, but narcissists are convinced they’re the center of everyone else’s universe, too. And if narcissists are so self-absorbed, it follows that they’re usually also:

  • Vain: Spend all that time thinking about nothing but yourself and you’ll likely end up thinking you’re the best thing ever. Narcissists love their personalities as much as their appearance.
  • Jealous: Narcissists feel very threatened by the idea that anyone might be better than they are.
  • Confident: Narcissists are decidedly self-assured, though that can range anywhere from normal confidence to downright arrogance.
  • Ruthless: While narcissists still have empathy (they aren’t psychopaths), it can often play second fiddle to their own needs—they’ll definitely throw someone under the bus if they feel they have to.

What narrative role do narcissists play?

Narcissists make great side characters, villains, and even comic relief. And while they are less likely to be a sole protagonist, narcissists are often featured with equal importance to other characters in ensemble shows.

Notable narcissist characters

Henry Higgins, “Pygmalion” (1913) 

In George Bernard Shaw’s play as well as its 1956 musical adaptation, “My Fair Lady” (music by Frederick Loewe, book and lyrics by Alan Jay Lerner), and the 1964 film (dir. George Cukor), phonetician and general piece-of-work Henry Higgins makes a bet that he can pass off a common flower girl as a proper lady. Higgins is portrayed both as a narcissist and a chauvinist. He’s blunt, matter-of-fact, and at times cruel in his around-the-clock efforts to rid Eliza Doolittle of her cockney dialect and lower-class ways. But his biggest display of narcissism is, of course, how he ultimately uses Eliza as a prop—after she helps to prove his linguistic point, he immediately drops her. And though he eventually privately shows some remorse, when she returns to him in the musical, he utters only, “Eliza, where the devil are my slippers?”

Jenna Maroney (Jane Krakowski), “30 Rock” (2006–2013)

On Tina Fey’s workplace comedy, actor Jenna Maroney is the best friend and often biggest annoyance of head writer Liz Lemon (Fey). Jenna is the poster child for comic relief narcissism. She’s self-absorbed to a fault, spending most of her time name-dropping, demanding attention (of any kind), singing her own praises (often literally!), and worrying that someone will eclipse her stardom. Iconic moments include responding, “I’ll do it, but only for the attention!” after being asked to participate in a drinking contest, faking multiple injuries to avoid having to share her birthday with a colleague, and stalking her former stalker to figure out why he lost interest in her. In fact, Jenna loves herself so much that her eventual husband, Paul L’Astname (Will Forte), is a Jenna Maroney impersonator. Seriously.

Don Draper (Jon Hamm), “Mad Men” (2007–2015)

Don Draper is the creative director of the 1960s advertising agency Sterling Cooper on Matthew Weiner’s long-running show—and he’s a covert narcissist. He’s at once cold and charming, mercilessly ambitious, and grandiose. His obsession with appearances is highlighted by the fact that he has essentially invented a more palatable, shiny backstory for himself by stealing a dead man’s dog tags. Egotistical to a fault, he sustains a steady diet of booze, power plays, and sexual trysts to try to feed his rapacious need for attention. Don even outright admits that he doesn’t believe in caring about anyone besides himself. Love “doesn’t exist,” he says, adding that, “What you call love was invented by guys like me, to sell nylons.”

Tahani Al-Jamil (Jameela Jamil), “The Good Place” (2016–2020)

Tahani Al-Jamil is a well-meaning but ultimately unadulterated narcissist. While friendly, well-spoken, and pleasant, she is also deeply competitive, obsessed with status, and incredibly superficial. It’s very telling that her punishment in the so-called Good Place is to be paired up with who she believes to be a silent monk, someone who isn’t impressed by her constant name-dropping (and couldn’t respond anyway). Michael Schur’s “The Good Place” is a unique show, however, in that much of it takes place in the afterlife, giving Tahani an opportunity most narcissistic characters never have: to eventually outgrow many of her more unattractive traits.

Deborah Vance (Jean Smart), “Hacks” (2021-)

Created by Lucia Aniello, Paul W. Downs, and Jen Statsky, the 2024 Emmy winner for best comedy series centers around textbook narcissist Deborah Vance, an aging comic so self-absorbed that she can’t (or won’t) see that she’s lost touch. She’s cutthroat, egotistical, and straightforward in a way that’s often insensitive and callous—though we eventually learn that some of this is in response to having to claw her way to the top as a young comic. While Deborah is the obvious narcissist, her new writer Ava Daniels (Hannah Einbinder) isn’t completely innocent of self-centered tendencies herself, making the two a match made in heaven (or hell, depending on how you see it). Smart has won three Emmy Awards for outstanding lead actress in a comedy series for her portrayal of Deborah (one for every season!).

How to become a narcissist for a performance

If you’re ready to turn your attention inward and take on the role of the narcissist, here are a couple things to keep in mind.

1. Understand where you fit in.

It’s crucial when playing a role like this to understand what function the narcissist serves in the plot. Narcissism can be very disturbing, but it can also be hysterical when played broadly for laughs. Both are correct, but it will depend on the piece.

2. Find empathy for your character. 

Narcissists aren’t generally looked upon very favorably (and usually with good reason). That said, as an actor, it’s your job to both empathize with and humanize your own character. How did they get this way? Are they compensating for something or hiding a deep insecurity? Asking the deeper questions will help make your narcissist a more fleshed-out and well-rounded character.

 3. Think “me, me, me.”

For once, really allow yourself to go for it. While actors are generally encouraged not to pull focus, a narcissistic character probably will; it’s in their nature to make it all about themselves, after all. Own it, and enjoy the rare opportunity to steal the spotlight and not feel bad about it. Who knows? Maybe you’ll be able to make a career (and win multiple Emmys!) out of it like Krakowski, who went on to portray another narcissist, Jacqueline White, on “Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt” (2015–2019). 

4. Love yourself.

Being an actor can come with some baggage that can keep you humble at best, and affect your self-confidence at worst—how thrilling to get to throw that out the window for a role! Your narcissistic character should love everything about themselves, and that’ll certainly influence everything from the way you speak to the way that you carry yourself.

More From Acting

Recommended

Now Trending