Stop Caring What Other People Think Of You

We expend so much energy trying to look good, maintain control, focus on the end result, micromanage, and worry about things that are insignificant. By doing so, we lose the ability to be fully expressed, liberated, and free in the moment.

You’ve got to stop caring how you think other people think of you. The truth is – they’re not thinking of you – because they’re thinking of themselves. Like all of us.

When I say, “care less,” I’m not asking you to stop caring about things that matter.

I’m talking about giving up worrying about things that have to do with the ego, such as how you look, how you’re perceived, trying to maintain appearances, and trying to show you have it all together.

Have you ever noticed that when you audition for something you don’t give a rat’s ass about, you end up booking? Why is this? At a practical level, you simply free yourself up in the moment and express yourself without judgment and concern for the end results. You don’t care how you look and consequently the energy that normally gets diffused when we are so concerned with the outcome, ends up instead being used properly, that is, creatively.

From a scientific and universal standpoint, it also is a declaration of alignment. In other words, you were totally in the moment of full creative expression. You weren’t second-guessing and stopping yourself from being expressed and you let go of the end results. Normally, we end up leaving an audition and immediately question every choice we made, desperately clinging to the need of wanting the job, beating ourselves up for what we didn’t do, and feeling like we totally stank up the room. All of these things are an implicit declaration to the universe stating “I don’t really believe I can have that.” And so we don’t.

Instead breathe. Remind yourself that you’re talented and a rock-star and you’re doing just fine where you are. Because you are. A job booking (or not booking) does not change the value of who you are, unless you believe it does. And the truth is, it never can. The only expectation you ever need to fulfill is letting go of the expectation of how you think something should look.

As you do, you’ll live more and care less.

Anthony Meindl is an award-winning writer, director, producer, and Artistic Director of Anthony Meindl's Actor Workshop (AMAW) in Los Angeles, where it was voted the Best Acting Studio in Los Angeles by Backstage in 2011 and 2012 (Best Scene Study and Best Cold Read). AMAW is also located in New York and Australia.

Meindl's first feature film, “Birds of a Feather,” won the Spirit of the Festival Award at the 2012 Honolulu Rainbow Film Festival, and he won Best Director at the Downtown Film Festival Los Angeles. He is a regular contributor to The Daily Love, Backstage, and various spirituality podcasts. He has been featured in ABC News, Daily Variety, LA Weekly, The Hollywood Reporter and the CW KTLA. He is also the author of the new best-selling book, “At Left Brain Turn Right,” which helps artists of all kinds unleash their creative genius within. Check out Meindl's free smartphone app on iTunes. 'Follow Meindl on Twitter @AnthonyMeindl.