Although it's got heart (lots of them, in fact, plastered all over the place), its sole strength lies in the casting of canny actors who know how to squeeze every available ounce of juice out of this baby's formula.
The film is basically an excuse to bring several name performers onto the same marquee, as they have their own story lines involving their romantic activities (or lack thereof) around Valentine's Day.
A florist (Ashton Kutcher) proposes to his girlfriend (Jessica Alba); a grade-school teacher (Jennifer Garner) is involved with a doctor (Patrick Dempsey) she doesn't know is married; an unlucky-in-love publicist (Jessica Biel) deals with a pesky reporter (Jamie Foxx) out to get a big scoop on her football-superstar client (Eric Dane); two single people (Julia Roberts and Bradley Cooper) strike up a conversation when they are seated next to each other on a plane; a lifelong secret comes to the surface in the marriage of an older couple (Shirley MacLaine and Hector Elizondo); their granddaughter (Emma Roberts) contemplates having sex with her naked guitar-playing boyfriend (Carter Jenkins); their nutty high school friends find each other (Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner); a young woman (Anne Hathaway) augments her income as a phone-sex operator while trying to fool her new boss (Queen Latifah) and boyfriend (Topher Grace). Throw in George Lopez for comic relief, and you've got the idea.
Katherine Fugate's script is by the numbers, and veteran sitcom master Garry Marshall keeps it in focus, but the film is only as good as its actors, and in this case a few of them manage to shine in their brief screen time.
Although it's an ensemble film, Kutcher and Garner get the most to play with, and both are enormously appealing and likable, even if their characters have all the depth of a wading pool. Cooper and Roberts are nicely understated, but "Grey's Anatomy" docs Dane and Dempsey can't seem to rev up their roles with any conviction.
Hathaway is solid as always, while Alba has little to do. Latifah and Biel have a few laughs, Foxx is okay, Grace is forgettable, and Kathy Bates as a TV news director must have had her part cut down—or she needs a new agent.
Most touching of all is the teaming of vets MacLaine and Marshall regular Elizondo, who give dimension to an elderly couple still learning new things about each other. A scene set in a cemetery that shows old movies at night is truly special when the two have an intense conversation as the MacLaine of 1958's "Hot Spell" unspools on the screen in the background.
For undemanding audiences or as a pleasant but paper-thin diversion, "Valentine's Day" fits the bill and at the very least is keeping a good part of the SAG roster employed.
Genre: Comedy
Written by: Katherine Fugate
Directed by: Garry Marshall
Starring: Jessica Alba, Kathy Bates, Jessica Biel, Bradley Cooper, Eric Dane, Patrick Dempsey, Hector Elizondo, Jamie Foxx, Jennifer Garner, Topher Grace, Anne Hathaway, Carter Jenkins, Ashton Kutcher, Queen Latifah, Taylor Lautner, George Lopez, Shirley MacLaine, Emma Roberts, Julia Roberts, Taylor Swift