Everyone's got a scabies story. And if you don't, you can always borrow monologist Dan Bernitt's. He's certainly well acquainted with the intense itching sensations and the embarrassment of discovering that the "human itch mite" is transmitted by, ahem, skin-to-skin contact. But don't be mislead; his solo entry in the Frigid New York festival, Thanks for the Scabies, Jerkface!, is about much more than just mysterious postcoital itching. In fact, Bernitt's personal accounts of intense discomfort and social embarrassment are startlingly universal.
More David Sedaris than Spalding Gray, Bernitt re-enacts his essay-like monologues in a casual storytelling style, offering oblique insights as he details some of the most uncomfortable moments of his young life. Dressed in a striped button-down shirt and lounging on folding chairs, Bernitt recounts a particularly harrowing visit to the urologist, his Provincetown performance as a "stripper poet," and the aforementioned mite encounter (his mother's helpful advice: "Don't go whoring yourself out, buddy") with wry wit and sideways self-awareness. Simultaneously hysterical and heart wrenching is Bernitt's tale of living with his "proudly homophobic" college roommate who publicly relishes his massive porn collection while Bernitt struggles with keeping his own sexuality hidden.
Of course, one gets the feeling that some of Bernitt's monologues would be better served if simply left on the page rather than performed on the stage. Additionally, the same youthfulness that instills Bernitt's work with vibrancy also causes him a few missteps — such as the interludes of adolescent coffee-house poetry or his clumsiness stepping in and out of narration. That said, Bernitt certainly shows promise as a writer; his growth is apparent in his final two monologues, recent additions that he reads while perched upon a barstool. Though less polished than his other work, they point toward a maturing sense of self and ongoing emotional growth. So while Thanks for the Scabies, Jerkface! isn't perfect, Bernitt's charming quips and burgeoning potential prove, well, contagious.
Presented as part of Frigid New York
at Under St. Marks, 94 St. Marks Place, NYC.
Feb. 29-March 9. Remaining performances: Tue., March 4, 6 p.m.; Thu., March 6, 10:30 p.m.; Fri., March 7, 7:30 p.m.; Sun., March 9, 4 p.m.
(212) 868-4444 or www.smarttix.com.