In an unscripted romance landscape that is known for the extremely produced and booze-filled dating shows like “The Bachelor” and “Love Island” came one that was very different: Netflix’s “Indian Matchmaking.” The series followed Indian singles and their families while matchmaker Sima Taparia, the subject of documentary “A Suitable Girl,” helps them find love and marriage. Martin Hardy and Meghan Griffin were responsible for helping find some of these singles, and it wasn’t just any old assignment. Working with Taparia, the team sought potential cast members throughout the U.S. and worked with the matchmaker halfway across the world in India to help assemble a group of people that had a chance to find genuine love. They shared with Backstage how they did it.
How to Get Cast on a Reality Show What was the casting process for “Indian Matchmaking”?
Martin Hardy: The show itself is based on the matchmaker Sima Taparia who has been doing this for many years. Part of it was going through her database and seeing the folks that had the best potential for TV from the folks that she already was very working with. We also opened it up to more people that could be actual clients across the U.S. We had two stacks, working through her client base and finding people that were looking for partners that she could work with, and then become their matchmaker. It was very interesting. The families made it a longer process, and also elaborate. It’s not just the data, we now have a family and cultural preferences that they’re looking for. These are things that a lot of them are doing on their own anyway, before we talk to them, they’re really looking for partners for their kids anyway. So it’s just allowing Meghan and I to come into that.
What considerations do you have to make when casting an unscripted show that deals with something vulnerable like relationships, especially with family involved?
MH: You do want to get the vulnerability from everyone, so we will make sure that they’re able to go on that journey truthfully. We’re looking for those qualities and we’re looking for people who are going to be interesting to watch whether they’re bigger characters or just have an interesting backstory or some kind of journey that you can see they’re going to go on.
Meghan Griffin: One thing I want to say about the vulnerability is that a lot of these people are so willing to do this. They really want to find love; they really want to find a partner. That was the refreshing thing for us. We were able to see it; there was that real passion for them to do it.
MH: On a project like this, we’re looking for people who are authentic, who want to find a partner, and want to find marriage. You don’t necessarily want somebody who’s all energy and bluster.
How did you work with Sima the matchmaker?
MH: We knew the guidelines in which she works and her approach so it helped us to ask the right questions.
MG: The show is classified into reality, but as we know, reality can be heavily produced in certain areas. With this show, it was very important to be as much like a documentary as possible, which is what allows all the authenticity to come out. What you saw is not people making that up. It was interviewing rather than leading.
What considerations did you have to make to assure there’d be chemistry on a show so focused on finding love?
MG: We are working with a matchmaker, so we get to benefit from her experience and everything that she is as a person. She’s a matchmaker but is definitely more than that. It comes to mind as you’re interviewing people like, Wow, I wonder if they’d do well with this person. But we are also very much not the matchmakers.
MH: When you’re interviewing people, it’s just a natural thing that comes up. You try to play matchmaker in your mind a little bit. We have to look at the cast from a bigger picture. Is there going to be enough diversity and options we could present to Netflix and to the matchmaker so that they could go and make their selection?
How to Nail a Reality TV Audition According to a CD What kind of research did you have to do to prepare to cast “Indian Matchmaking”?
MH: We just wanted to make sure we knew about the different communities and religions. A lot of that was in reports.
MG: It was a lot of doing our homework, and then also being respectful when asking questions. Always make sure you leave room to learn something and not assuming we know when we go in.
“We want authentic people who are themselves, who are confident in themselves, and unapologetic for who they are. Just to be yourself and don’t be afraid to be yourself.”
What made this show different from other unscripted projects you’ve worked on?
MG: The families are organically such a part of this process with their children. It wasn’t just a matter of getting someone interested in dating on sites. It’s also a matter of getting their families involved in hearing their wants and how sometimes they’re the same and sometimes they’re a little different and balancing those two. It’s really interesting to see how Sima works and the different wants and needs and the different generations. You want to make sure you’re never leading with questions like, What do you want? What do you want for your kids? It’s about letting them answer from a place of truth and not trying to produce it into a bucket. It’s asking, What is the actual real want or desire? And what’s the reason behind that? It could be tied into the culture or family background or personal experiences. Also, getting to really speak with the families in India and learn about them, see their dynamics together, and see couples who’ve been together for like 40 years that were brought together by a matchmaker and see how in love they are. I thought that was really beautiful and unique and special to be able to interview them.
MH: It is the matchmaking process. Just learning about it and being able to be a part of it was a teachable moment for a lot of people in Western culture. It wasn’t just a job. It’s exciting. When you find something like that, it makes you want to keep working because you’re, so excited by it.
When diving into a community you’re not familiar with, where do you start looking for people and how do you begin one of those searches?
MG: It’s a lot of cold calling and cold emailing to people who are in that world. Research whatever the world is that you’re going into, and then start reaching out to people. Maybe it’s businesses, or maybe it’s a big social media presence. It depends on the show when it comes to who you’re going to be reaching out to. I don’t like to waste any time getting on the phone. I think you want to get to the phone quicker and start to ask questions and learn about them. Maybe they’re not right for that concept, but that could lead you to someone else who is. Maybe they’re not interested in TV, but they went to school with someone who could be perfect. And then it’s just networking there, too.
MH: You have to think, I don’t know a lot about this new world, this new community, it’s my job to find out about it. I really have to figure out how to know as much as I can before I even jump in. It’s about going to your resources. In certain cases, it might be your producer, it might be the network, it could be past contacts or friends who might know about something. Make yourself as informed as possible so you can start peeling back those layers and jumping into different communities to find what you need.
A CD on What to Know About Getting Cast on a Reality Competition Show What advice would you give someone who might be right for a show you’re casting but isn’t familiar with the TV world or casting process?
MH: We want authentic people who are themselves, who are confident in themselves, and unapologetic for who they are. Just to be yourself and don’t be afraid to be yourself. You’re not going to be right for everything, but if there’s a certain thing we’re looking for, we’ve seen you and that’s who you are, we’ll see it because you’re being yourself.
MG: Social media is your friend, too, especially if you have a business or if you’re a new designer, we’re not going to find you if you’re not out there. If you’re nervous about being on camera, get used to making stories where you’re explaining something about what you do. Through social media, you have an audience that’s usually people who know you and are going to be supportive. And like Martin said, be authentic in that. Don’t be what you think people want to see; be yourself and find your own point of view, and your own voice and stand strong on that. It’s not trying to be what we’re looking for, what that casting call is looking for. Even if you’re not right for the project, we’ll remember you. If you were great in an interview, we will bother you again.
“I think a lot of people think that it is all fake. In my experience, sometimes things are heightened or produced, but a part of our job is to find people who are authentically doing these jobs or having these points of view. It’s not a lie.”
What might someone be able to expect from the audition process?
MG: It starts with a phone call or an email, or even going through the “official” casting process. Usually, we’ll reach out first, sometimes we’ll post something and you can respond to the post or mobile reach out directly. From there, it’s usually a phone call to learn a little bit more about you and your point of view, and their experiences and expertise. The next step is typically a video interview or video call where we record it, and then we edit that down. That’s what we would share with the network or the production company. From there, they decide if they want to move them forward, sometimes that means moving forward to a chemistry test, or a presentation, or a pilot. Sometimes it’s not right for that one. In that case, we’ll usually keep those people in mind for something else.
What don’t people know or realize about what you do?
MG: I think a lot of people think that it is all fake. In my experience, sometimes things are heightened or produced, but a part of our job is to find people who are authentically doing these jobs or having these points of view. It’s not a lie.
MH: The time that it takes for things to come to fruition, I think people don’t understand. We can be casting for months. Sometimes things go on for many months, almost a year for certain projects. It just depends on what we’re working on. People don’t understand how much goes into development and how many people are deciding what gets on the air. There’s a whole world happening, a whole process, constantly. A production does take a lot of work and people to make happen.
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